Jack/Renee blue

leigh57


Out where the dreams are high

Straight to the valley of the great divide


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Meme Fic
Jack/Renee blue
leigh57
I'm posting these one at a time because I never know when I'm going to get the next one finished. However, at least I've managed to get writing again, so that's something? Heh. Or not. Thanks to Adrienne and Jess for super quick betas. Anyway. . .

For lowriseflare, who is entirely evil for making me do this,
1.

“You still dating that stockbroker?” he asks one afternoon. She has cramps and forgot her Advil. “What was his name?” Elliot continues, sticking the yellow copy of some form in his outbox. “Ridge? Ledge?”

She wants to say None of your business or Why don’t you go fuck a cheese grater?, but then he might respond and she’d rather live Advil-free for the rest of her life than talk to him right now.

So she says, “Cliff. And no.”

Elliot makes a noise that might be Huh or Oh or Good -- it’s too generic for her to decide.

She stares at him across the desk, her abdomen twisting so painfully she’s holding her breath, and wonders if he can hear her thinking, Fuck you. Just to be certain, she thinks it at the top of her lungs, and sure enough a second later he looks up.


2.

The bullet barely draws blood. The raised purple bruise on her knee she got tackling a suspect a couple days ago both looks and feels a lot worse. But it’s an INCIDENT, so there’s procedure to be followed and they can’t go anywhere until papers are signed and statements taken. Elliot’s unbuttoned the top of his shirt and he’s fiddling with the knot in his tie. He lost it for a second when she was hit, running toward her and yelling, just until he realized.

Now he won’t look at her.

Finally she leans against the hood of the cruiser, pulls out her notepad and says, “Come on. Tic tac toe. We’re gonna be here for awhile.”

He hesitates but finally strides over. “I’m X.”

“Fine.” She pulls a blue ballpoint pen out of her pocket. Medium, not fine, because even though she likes fine he prefers the medium and after ten years she still orders them for him.

It isn’t until they’ve finished their fifth consecutive cat’s game that she looks at the haphazard mishmash of navy blue lines, Xs, and Os, and thinks, Shit. Yes. Exactly.


3.

He knows things are more than a little out of control when he tears up over an Emmylou Harris song. He hates Emmylou Harris. He fucking hates country music period, with all its incessant crying and whining about the daddy who didn’t love you or your one true love who left you all alone with a six pack of Bud Lite. He only knows the lyrics to this song because when Kathy was pregnant with the twins, she refused to listen to anything but The Horse Whisperer soundtrack, and Elliot certainly wasn’t going to argue with her under those conditions. And he’s only stuck on this station because he was scanning when some asshole in a red Mercedes cut him off, forcing him to grab the wheel with both hands.

That’s not the point anyway. The point is that at seven fifteen a.m. on a fall Tuesday he’s sitting in rush hour traffic with a sick heavy feeling in his chest over some goddamn song lyrics.

He doesn’t switch the channel though. I used to be half of the whole of you and me / Now I’m the limit of all I am.

When the song is finally over, he twists the silver knob until it lands on classic rock and wipes the back of his hand over his eyes.

He doesn’t know if the words remind him of Kathy or Olivia.

The real bitch of it is he thinks maybe both.


4.

He slams through the bullpen doors on Friday morning, forty-five minutes late. Another fight with Kathy, who walked out in the middle of the “conversation” and took Eli to spend the weekend at her mom’s. He’s sure the twins already have plans.

Olivia’s not there, her desk neatly arranged the way it was when she left last night, no coffee cup by the computer or coat thrown carelessly over the back of her chair.

She hadn’t said she wasn’t coming in, and for a second his mind does that thing where fifty horrifying scenarios play out in what seems like an impossibly small period of time.

He taps his knuckles on Cragen’s doorframe. “Where’s Liv?”

“Taking a personal day. Aren’t you supposed to be in court in ten minutes?” Cragen’s phone rings.

“Yeah. I’m on my way.”

He ducks into the locker room to find some deodorant; it’s not even nine and he’s already clammy. He fishes in his pocket for his phone and hits Olivia’s number.

“Benson.”

“You okay?”

“I’m fine. Why?” She sounds distracted, and he can’t identify the noise he hears in the background. A shower maybe?

“I don’t know. I just thought-” He takes a breath and glances down at his own knuckles where they bend around the grey handle of his coffee mug. They’re white. “Maybe you’d call.”

“I did call. I called Cragen.”

Screw you. No really. “Right. I’ll see you Monday.”

“Yeah. Bye.”

It takes all the energy inside him not to hurl his coffee cup against the metal wall of lockers, just for the satisfaction of watching it shatter into thousands of shards.


5.

It’s a December Wednesday, almost midnight, and they’re not even close to being finished with prep for Alex’s case tomorrow. The suspect is a serial rapist who went close to two decades without being caught, and they can’t fuck this up. For some reason Elliot has the radio on to the all Christmas all the time station, but he’s looked so pathetic since the second she walked in this morning that Olivia can’t bring herself to turn it off even when she has to grit her teeth through the horror about the Christmas shoes. Her ass hurts from sitting in her chair too long, and she can’t stop being distracted by the ridiculous stuffed Santa skunk Fin has sitting on the edge of his desk.

She glances at Elliot, whose eyes are fixed at a point on his desk slightly left and above the paper he’s supposed to be studying.

Suddenly she stands up. “Let’s go. We need coffee and donuts now.”

“What?” His expression is the same one she imagines he might wear if she had just said, I’m gonna go screw Rush Limbaugh. Back in ten! The surprise on his face feels like a cut, like a bad incision with a dull instrument, and she’s reminded again that for as long as she chooses to keep doing this, the level of pain he can inflict without even trying will always hold the power to surprise her.

But it’s Christmastime and they have court in just over eight hours, so she only says, “We’re not going to get anything else done without sugar and coffee. My treat.”

“Okay.” He pulls his wool coat on and holds the door for her as they leave, and she hates herself for noticing when five years ago she wouldn’t have.

Outside it’s colder than she realized. She should have worn her heavier coat. She shivers, and without breaking his stride Elliot pulls off his wool tweed and slips it over her shoulders. She almost rejects it but the residual warmth hits her skin and she mumbles, “Thanks.”

“Yeah.” He walks faster, probably in an attempt to stay warm.

“I’m gonna look like hell tomorrow. We’ll be lucky if we can catch a few hours in the crib.”

He glances sideways at her, grinning. “Well you can’t look as bad as you did when you testified on the Williamson case.”

“Shut up,” she mutters, pushing at his shoulder. “I had the stomach flu.”

“I know. The judge put everything on hold three times because you were in the bathroom.”

“Please. That’s nothing compared to the time you managed to drive into a fire hydrant on the way to testify against Jason Ballard and we all had to sit there for an hour and a half.” She pushes her hands into the pockets of his coat. “I thought Alex was going to fillet you.”

“Well she put salt in my coffee the next morning. A lot of salt.”

“Seriously? You never told me that.”

“I drank it, too.”

“I’m sure you did. You’re such an ass.”

“I know,” he says, with more gravity than her comment required. “Sometimes I really am.” He pauses. “So are you gonna get the bar with that disgusting maple goo on top or the gross pumpkin muffin with the crystallized sugar globs?”

“Maybe I’ll surprise you,” she shoots back, smirking. “Could happen.”

He grins, knocking his elbow lightly into hers. “It could.”

Her throat scratchy from exhaustion and probably an impending cold, Olivia gazes at the Christmas lights sparkling in bright-colored strings all over the lampposts and considers all the things she does not know in this life.

What she does know is that this is what’s left, the occasional five minutes of unexpected magic when the last few years vanish like vapor and they can still be them, distilled.

  • 1
*gasp* Aaaand, you killed me. Dead.

Don't be dead! I mean, I hope at least dead in the good way? I blame it all on Katie. Totally. Thanks:)

Oh, it was a good dead, as it were. ;) I was just temporarily in shock that you wrote SVU again, and then in my weakened state, blown away by the awesomeness of it.

Anyway, for serious, I hate that you don't write them anymore, because you just get them and all their fucked up neuroses and utter dysfunction. I wonder sometimes how they are able to get dressed in the morning. I mean, gah, their banter, and her thinking at the top of her lungs and him not looking at her after she was shot and getting teary over a song in the car and FUCK. You made my head explode with the awesomeness.

Exactly how did Katie get this out of you, and what can I do to replicate that? I make some pretty mean brownies. Seriously, I just made these ( http://smittenkitchen.com/2009/09/cheesecake-swirled-brownies/ ) and they like stop traffic because they are so good. ;)

OMG those brownies seriously look heavenly. *debates the pain of dragging more svufic out of my brain. . . *

Okay brace yourself. This is going to be so much a longer answer than you ever wanted. But here you have it. I LOVED Elliot and Olivia. Loved loved. You know I did. I wrote them for two years, with two huge stories there, and that took up a lot of my discretionary time. I stressed over character, worked my ass off to make it plausible, and shipped them like woah. And the show gave me. . . nothing.

Now I realize that you and TONS of other people have managed to keep sailing despite this. But for me? Elliot and Olivia at this point are a mockery of themselves. I honestly can't watch without laughing. There is just so much wtfery and so many episodes like the one Katie fondly refers to as "A Very Special SVU: Olivia Goes to Prison." It's like they're all special, and Hargitay and Meloni are kinda mugging it up to see if they can get an Emmy. The entire thing gives me a headache.

In order to have even a chance of writing something decent, I have to be able to put myself in a room and love love love the characters. How did Katie get me to do this? Well, I was having horrifying writer's block so I posted that silly meme and she gave me them as a prompt. So I've sworn to myself I'm going to write all the prompts, no matter how insane. The funny thing was that I sat down to write and thought it would be like four hundred words, but alas. I am truly incapable of brevity. More stuff just came spilling out.

See this is why Jack and Renee are my huge obsession now. 24 has a lot of flaws, but holy shit at least there is a CHANCE that the two halves of my ship will lock lips in the upcoming season. Last season they met in the first hour and I got more ship than I got in eight years of SVU. Hell even Kiefer ships them. And yes, I could be setting myself up for HUGE disappointment (and probably am because this is the way those things usually work), but at least the possibility is out there. I can't see Elliot and Olivia ever getting together now, unless it was like, the last ep or one of them was leaving.

Also? (You're like, omg she's not done yet?) I'm canon's bitch and I can't write Elliot cheating. I've been married for 12 years and I fucking HATE cheaters. So if he cheated I'd hate him, and I can't write about characters I hate. When he was separated from Kathy, THAT was easy enough. Now that his toolish self went back in the wtfiest move ever, I'm like, eh?

LOL! So there you go, with everything you didn't actually want to know about why I can't write svufic any more. But holy crap I gotta admit this was fun for a few minutes, and I'm so happy you liked it. I really am.

I totally understand where you're coming from. I think part of the reason I keep hanging on to this show is that I can't let go of just how freaking awesome it was, and how it could be that again if the writers would just like, use their brains. I'm not even talking about E/O at this point, cause I know that isn't gonna happen, but just getting the show back onto solid ground and them working as partners and friends. Also, not gonna lie that my lust for Meloni has something (a lot) to do with it.

Now that his toolish self went back in the wtfiest move ever, I'm like, eh?

For serious. And the thing is, even though the whole baby plot was totally bogus regardless, it was made worse by the fact that it was all done so, so badly. Gah. This show will be the death of me.

Anyway, I'm glad your writer's block exercise brought this out. I will likely try to tempt you with baked goods from time to time, but I'm sure you won't mind. ;)

but just getting the show back onto solid ground and them working as partners and friends

YES! THIS EXACTLY! If they only could have done this, I would still be there. As much as I wanted the ship, I could totally live with them being good friends, goofing around and being silly every now and then the way they were in the first few seasons. But NO. Ugh. Seriously granola bars to you for hanging in.

And no, I definitely won't mind being tempted with baked goods from time to time. Not at all:)

Your Lawyer: Your Honor, my client pleads guilty to approximately twenty counts of attempted murder by awesome fic.

The Judge: I sentence you to keep writing fic in perpetuity, especially when the eighth season of 24 begins.


Murder by awesome fic! You are too funny. More like, murder by the voices in my head that won't stop TALKING. And don't even get me thinking about S8. If they give me any Jack/Renee it's just gonna be all *thud.* Thank you!

This feels so retro! Like the olden days. Like Maryland and mac and cheese and sophomore year and...and and Chris swooning. And haystacks, not the food.

Anyway. I'm so impressed that you wrote this in like an hour. With all these incredible analogies and insight into the staleness of their...stasis.

More things I loved that I didn't mention in the other review:

1) The third possibility of Elliot's thought being Good And how that says everything, but means nothing as far as where they're going.

2) Elliot rushing to her side after she's shot, but now he won't look at her. Ah, the intensity. I can just feel it.

3)Elliot STRIDING over to play tic tac toe. Excellent word choice. I can see his strut. It's so pompous. Jerk. Then the "I'm X." SO very Stabler.

4)The fact that Olivia still orders the pens he prefers. Killer detail, Shana.

5)Elliot hating country music.

6) EMMYLOU. SHE IS THE BEST.

7)"Heavy in his chest"- perfect descriptor. And the fact that the lyric reminds him of both of them. And how you describe this revelation as a "bitch."

8) Elliot's knuckles white, while he contemplates Olivia not calling HIM, dammit.

9)Just in general, your italicized thoughts that are oh so telling, and oh so Benson/Stabler. Screw you. No really.

10) Santa!Skunk and how Olivia can't bring herself to turn off the Christmas music.

11) Equating the idea of going to get coffee with her as being as surprising as The Rush Limbaugh screwing comment. Yeah, that was genius and... ouch.

12)The entire last sentence, particularly the vapor analogy, both because it "vanishes" which provides for good alliteration, but "distilled" too, which is just too cool for words. And "this is what's left."

Great job on this, bb! :)

Retro is right. It feels like coffee in the brown house and headdesking over mortgage stress and writing when I'm supposed to grading. Oh, just! Also, fuck me why can't I have that dream about Jack? No really life is so unfair. *sobs*

Hee the striding. And the X. He's so alpha male. I still say Jack could make him cry like a little baby;) "Take a seat."

OMG Emmylouuuuuuuuuuuuu. Icon loooooooooooooove. We saw herrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!!!

I liked Santa!Skunk, too. Although I love how I don't even know how to spell Fin any more. FAIL. Anyway hon I'm babbling, but in short, THANK YOU and you're just the awesomest. Muah.

OMG! I love it! You write them so well!! Have you written SVU fic before? If you have, where might one find this treasure? :)

Thank you -- I'm so glad you enjoyed my little trip down memory lane:)

And in the category of "Be super careful what you wish for": http://www.svufiction.com/viewuser.php?uid=1913.

Another lifetime. Oy.

p.s. I love your icon.

eta: Also? I think you have to log in on that site now if you want to read the actual soft porn. *headdesks at the thought of my first sex scene EVER*

Edited at 2009-09-23 12:12 pm (UTC)

And in the category of "Be super careful what you wish for": http://www.svufiction.com/viewuser.php?uid=1913.

mr burns animated

EXCELLENT.

YAY, I'm sooo excited! I've been shipping Elliot and Olivia since forever. I registered but how do I decide what to read first?? I'm sure they're all amazing. :D :D

p.s. I love your icon.
Ha, I'm so obsessed with anything winter and rain, mainly umbrellas. :)

OMG Mr. Burns! Dying now:)

I registered but how do I decide what to read first??

Augh I don't generally (read: ever) rec my own fics, but my fav EO fic I wrote is "Flicker." If you want to be entertained by a very early form of my writing style, "Equilibrium" is the first fanfic I ever wrote. Okay that's a lie. The first fanfic I ever posted. :-P

Also, can you still ship Elliot and Olivia? Not gonna lie -- I haven't watched the show in like 2 1/2 years, and the only reason I wrote that was the prompt from Katie. They just got too depressing for me.

Photobucket :)

I finished the first chapter of "Flicker" and I love it. You're so talented! You depict characters so well, to the smallest detail. They always speak in their own unique voice, so when you're reading you can really connect to the story.

Also, can you still ship Elliot and Olivia? Not gonna lie -- I haven't watched the show in like 2 1/2 years, and the only reason I wrote that was the prompt from Katie. They just got too depressing for me.
I don't watch it regularly for two reasons. One, the channel it's on is a mess, so I'm never sure when to watch or what season I'm watching. And second, 10 years of UST is more than my shipper heart can take. I can get physically agitated when seeing these two on screen together. I know it's crazy, but I'm a hardcore shipper. :D I did watch the season 10 finale because I heard it was excellent, and it really was.

They just got too depressing for me.
You mean the ship? Or the show in general?

Aww, thanks so much for the lovely "Flicker" comments. For some reason that story is just super close to my heart, which sounds so cheesy when I type it, but there you go. It's true, and I usually don't feel that way about my writing.

You mean the ship? Or the show in general?

The ship. And I don't even mean I needed them naked and sweaty, although sure that would be nice;) But basically I think they screwed all the FUN out of the show. After Fault, I thought something might happen, but when it didn't I would have been happy if we could have gone back to Elliot and Olivia joking around and being super good friends. But no! They're just . . . weird!

That's why I survived XF for so long, because even when Mulder and Scully weren't together, they just so WERE.

Fault was such an amazing, intense episode. I really thought it would make them recognize their feelings for each other. It's disappointing that the writers keep ignoring an aspect of the show and the partnership that's clearly there. But I still have hope. :)

I completely agree about Mulder and Scully.

PWOEAI JT;OWI JGWEX;,RCHSTJKSKAJHD.

OH MY GOD I LOVE THIS SO MUCH I CAN'T STOP CAPSLOCKING. IT IS LIKE. MY FAVORITE THING YOU HAVE EVER WRITTEN. WHICH GOES TO SHOW YOU DON'T NEED ME TO BETA YOU EVER AGAAAAAAAAAIN.

So many things. Fuck a cheese grater. Him HEARING HER THOUGHTS. She got shot and now he won't look at her. EVERYTHING ABOUT THEM PLAYING TIC TAC TOE. Kathy being prego and listening to the Horse Whisperer. "I did call. I called Cragen" being the bitchiest thing Olivia has EVER SAID, canonically or otherwise. Elliot needing deodorant because he's clammy! "Could happen." "It could."

SHANA. I'd give you a kidney. Holy CRAP. I did not even know I was capable of having these feelings anymore! I don't even know who I AM.

Okay not gonna lie -- I think I'm scared that I just wrote your favorite thing ever in two hours about a couple I can't even stand anymore. Don't you think that's a little frightening? Either that or it argues for the idea that I write better when I don't give a fuck? Yikes.

Anyway! I'm so glad you liked it. I love how I sneak shit like Emmylou in there because I'm a huge dong like that. And I did like the tic tac toe thing. Every now and then I truly entertain myself.

As for not knowing who you are, try being me right now. This effing thing was supposed to be like 500 words long. WTF? Also, OMG don't even say I don't need you to beta me. You have no clue the trauma I had hitting "post" when you hadn't seen a word of this. Seriously. I just don't DO that.

Thanks, Katie. You rock. Even if you made me write them;)

eta: Not if I gave you one first.

Edited at 2009-09-23 02:16 pm (UTC)

I've never seen SVU, but you wrote this so I read it anyway, and...wow. You're amazing. The fact that you can make me feel happy and flaily over a couple from a show I know nothing about is just...akjdlkasjf. You have such a gift for writing.

Why don’t you go fuck a cheese grater? HAHAHA that is brilliant. I kind of want to use that sometime. XD
She pulls a blue ballpoint pen out of her pocket. Medium, not fine, because even though she likes fine he prefers the medium and after ten years she still orders them for him. I loved that. One of my favorite things about your writing is how you bring attention to seemingly minor details that say SO MUCH. Like the candle in Harvest that Jack and Renee fought over.
• I loved the last line in #2, with the "haphazard mishmash of navy blue lines, Xs, and Os". That was such epic phrasing.
• I like how you put Emmylou Harris in there. XD
Olivia’s not there, her desk neatly arranged the way it was when she left last night, no coffee cup by the computer or coat thrown carelessly over the back of her chair. This was amazing, because it showed how he notices all the things she does when she IS there, and then the fact that he got all worried thinking about why she wasn't there and all the possible things that could've happened to her and it just shows how much he cares and GAH.
#5 was my favorite, partially because it was Christmas-centered and I absolutely love when stories are set around Christmastime (which was one of the reasons why I love Not Dark Yet part 2 so much) but fuck, it's just so awesome I don't even know where to start. I love how you used the "I’m gonna go screw Rush Limbaugh. Back in ten!" line to compare to how shocked Elliot was (not to mention it was hilarious), Olivia noticing how Elliot was holding the door for her (and hating the fact that she DID notice), him putting his coat over her to keep her warm, and their exchange about how they each caused a case to be put on hold/delayed.
•Her throat scratchy from exhaustion and probably an impending cold, Olivia gazes at the Christmas lights sparkling in bright-colored strings all over the lampposts and considers all the things she does not know in this life.
• What she does know is that this is what’s left, the occasional five minutes of unexpected magic when the last few years vanish like vapor and they can still be them, distilled.

I had to quote those last two lines because holy fuck I wish I could explain to you exactly why I love those lines and why they made me all flaily and sdhfoahjdfijsahd but there are seriously no words to describe how much I love them...they're just so beautifully written.

(Btw, it was almost 80 degrees here today. >.< I want my fall weather back!)

Um, OMG? I can't believe you read this silliness when you don't even WATCH SVU. Not that I watch SVU any more, but that's another story. Seriously I don't even know how to tell you how blushy and GAH you make me with all these compliments. The freakin' annoying truth about this story is that it was so much easier for me to write than Jack/Renee stuff is, and I think it's because I don't effing care! Blah. Anyway. . .

Regarding details? I'm obsessed with them. That's why they show up so frequently in my stories. My brain is just weird and it thinks up weird things and poof. I have to write them. Also hee to the Emmylou Harris. I even made myself snicker with that one, having Elliot hate her when I worship at her feet.

And Christmas FTW! OMG it's completely my favorite time of year. I love nothing more, and it slips into my stories far more than it probably should. In any case, thank you so much for your amazing comments here. I'm still kinda in shock that you even bothered to read about a couple you don't know or ship.

Finally, hell YES to give me fall back. Yesterday was so revolting I was a terrible mom and wouldn't even go outside to play with S. Ergh. The seven day looks more promising though. . . :)

The freakin' annoying truth about this story is that it was so much easier for me to write than Jack/Renee stuff is, and I think it's because I don't effing care!
When you did watch SVU, though, and you were more attached to Elliot and Olivia, was it harder to write fics for them then? I know it's more difficult to write about characters who you really care about, because you don't want to do them an injustice by portraying them in a way that makes them look stupid or doesn't seem in character.

I'm still kinda in shock that you even bothered to read about a couple you don't know or ship.
*points to the first sentence of my previous comment* You wrote it. Enough said. :P

Complete truth? I've never had it bad for any ship as badly as I have it for Jack and Renee. I can't even quite pinpoint what it is about them that "hits my kink" (Kay's phrase that I adore so much I have to borrow it), but they just DO. I will always consider Mulder and Scully the mothership, and my love for them is entirely insane. *gazes at all nine seasons and first XF movie lined up neatly on the bookshelf behind me* And I'm not even going to try to put into words the difference between them and Jack and Renee for me, but uh, yeah. Clearly I just. . . have Jack and Renee problems. Also brevity problems! All that is to say that no, I never had this much trouble writing Elliot and Olivia, because I never loved them this much.

You wrote it. Enough said.

Gah I truly think you make me more blushy than anyone. Ack! Thank you:)

i finally found it--win for me! but mostly win for you.

it turns out you're still perfect at this even when you hate them. that's a little disgusting, shana. you may have even made me Feel Feelings. Real Feelings (or, you know...as close as it gets). mostly my fave though is that you're so fucking funny. ridge? ledge? cliff! i didn't see that one coming like a mack truck...brilliant. fucking a cheese grater is *probably* an image i could've lived without; but i don't have a dick so it's not as offensive as it could have been. and the juxtaposition of that vehemence against the non-committal 'NOYB' is fab.

thinking at the top of her lungs i love; and it's funny bc the ncis (shut up. i can hear you. shut UP!) premiere was this week and there's this line where tony's all, "you're not just wrong, you're wrong at the top of your lungs." i was getting the trash together and BURST out laughing.

the tic-tac-toe is fucking GENIUS...fer serious, rico. but elliott knows the words to slow surprise? really? i was emo to that song before emo was emo...but as emo as elliott is, i'm just not sure....

"Screw you. No really." -- i said that to alex yesterday. bleepity bleep bleep.

i LIKE this: "she hates herself for noticing when five years ago she wouldn’t have." -- that is...yes. that we become these things we don't mean to become. oops!

entire last sentence is like a beautiful-word nail in the coffin. tell us how you *really* feel, shana :P (you're right, of course.)

i am fuzzily happy in the way your writing always makes me...word to whoever made you write this biz. M/S time now?



hehehehehe I liked my cheesegrater thing! But like you, I don't have a dick, so perhaps I don't quite understand its horror.

*snortNCISsnort*

And dude I explained why Elliot knew the words! It wasn't his fault! *snerks*

Yeah that last sentence just kind of came out of nowhere, but really it probably sums up how I would feel about them if I you know, actually ever watched the show anymore. I still can't believe Katie made me do this (or that you're going to make me write Mulder and Scully). But hey! It's good for me to get past the writer's block, so I'm glad it made you happy and fuzzy. Or whatever!

But also? See you never should have sent that Cyndi Lauper song, because it has made Mark discover "Water's Edge," to which I am now listening on repeat without ceasing and which is making me want to write NOTHING but Jack and Renee. This is not helpful with so many more memes to write;)

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